Stomping in My Bitch Boots: A Lesson in Self-Love

Hey all! Sorry I’ve been a little MIA, life is crazy with school and other things that gobble up time, but I’m back! Enjoy.

Do you ever have those days where you catch yourself in the mirror and you’re all like “Oh god when did I get this hot?” Well, I was having one of those days today when I caught myself in the mirror of my elevator while I was hauling groceries back to my apartment. Now, I’m generally not shy about looking in mirrors, but today I was caught off guard. I think I’m a prettty good looking lady, but I didn’t expect to look so good after hauling my groceries down the road and into the lobby. I imagined sweat stains at the pits of my shirt and that my long dark hair was in distress after being out in the sun and being blown around by the wind. Neither were true! My outfit was still perfectly put together, and dare I say that I even looked smaller than I remembered myself?

I think this awesome feeling was due in part to the fact that I was wearing my amazing ‘Bitch Boots’. My Bitch Boots are this amazing pair of lace up boots that have zips on the side (so you never actually have to tie them up), and look totally rocking with a pair of skinny jeans tucked into them. I even remember buying them: I was with my friend Sam looking around in Aldo. Before going shopping I promised myself that I wouldn’t buy anything and that it was simply to be a window shopping excursion. But no! Everything changed once I lay my eyes on my boots. Made of black leather (or probably fake leather, but shh) they were all hot, feminine, powerful and dare I say hipster all in one! Plus they were on sale, so that was a major bonus. Before I knew it I found myself trying them on, modelling them in one of those tiny little mirrors that make it so you can see only your feet.

They were amazing! I had to have them! Sam didn’t discourage it. I figured I would get a good bang for my buck, as they would last and wouldn’t go out of style for a while. Even though I loved them, I wondered what the boyfriend would think. I imagined him making fun of me, accusing me of being a hipster. Not like he can talk; he loves bands that no body knows and he just emulates that vibe sometimes. (Sorry bf, but remember I have leftover chocolate cake that you want!) Regardless, I was gonna buy them and wear them even if no one else liked them.

These are the Bitch Boots!

This idea of feeling powerful regardless of what other people think of you is essential for good self-esteem and confidence. However, it’s easy to let other people’s ideals of beauty rob you of this power. You can totally forget about your natural beauty by absorbing some bullshit mainstream idea of what is hot and what is not. Fuck those bastards! You should be the only one who decides what features of yourself make you hot.

Just yesterday I was at the grocery store buying some groceries for a little get together I was having with some friends. Since it was a Saturday afternoon (prime time for grocery shopping) I spent some time in line waiting to check out my groceries. Now, while I was waiting it was absolutely impossible to ignore the headlines on all the magazines. That 5 to 10 minute wait in a grocery store line is how I get updated in the ‘pop world’. (Oh and www.jezebel.com).

The tabloids on Star Magazine (I think it was Star) are what caught my eyes first. Headlines such as: Too Skinny and Starving to be Perfect leaped out at me. There were images of celebrities such as Kim Kardashian, Gwen Stefani, and Jessica Simpson, and there was something critical to say about each of their appearance. Jessica Simpson was criticized for her baby weight and recent weight loss. How can you criticize someone for their weight gain during pregnancy? They just had a baby for gods-sakes! Kim Kardashian’s picture was accompanied with something along the lines of Still wanting to lose some more pounds, while Gwen Stefani’s picture had a quote with something along the lines of I practically starve myself to stay skinny. Oh, did I also mention she was wearing a crop top and you could practically see her ribs?

What. The. Fucking. Hell. This magazine is criticizing female celebrities for being too skinny, but at the same time these types of images are what perpetuates poor body image, crash dieting, and excessive exercising. Of course it goes in the opposite direction too: some people may binge, deprive themselves of food, or follow extremely rigid excercise and eating plans. I couldn’t help but feel a little bit angry. It seems as though there is no such thing as ‘good enough’ when it comes to bodies and appearance. If a woman is too skinny, she is accused of having an eating disorder. If a woman is too curvy, it must be mentioned all the time. This extreme idea of thinking in terms of being too skinny or being too heavy leaves little room for the development of positive body image and self-esteem. I would also argue that it leaves one in a constant state of worry and concern about their body. Er, let me rephrase that: sometimes it leaves me in a state of worry and concern.

Anyways, with all this scrutiny of women’s bodies in magazines, it’s great to have one article of clothing that always makes you feel awesome, no matter what the day. Even though the way magazine articles still anger me with regards to how they scrutinize female’s bodies, I have learned to separate myself from it and see it as realistically as possible. These women don’t get a break with how they look because they are under scrutiny all the time. I’m guessing this makes them need to look a certain way, because that’s what their manager wants, and it will help them sell more albums, or do better at the box office. Maybe they would actually love to be ten pounds heavier, but they are sacrificing it to follow their dream. I can’t judge.

It’s true!

I, on the other hand, don’t have the paparazzi following me, and I am the only person that passes criticism on myself. (Well other people do I’m sure, but I don’t notice and don’t really care that much). I have learned that I have power over how I feel about myself, so I am going to love the way I look, and love the way that makes me feel. So if a pair of awesome boots is what gets me there in the process, why the fuck not? These boots to me are more than just a pair of boots. I am reclaiming the word ‘bitch’ to encompass something strong and powerful, and it can be used as a compliment rather than an insult.

Life is too short to spend time worrying about all the little lumps and bumps. (Perceived or otherwise). Don’t let beauty ideals and ideas of perfection stop you in your tracks. You are perfect just the way you are, so keep on stomping in your bitch boots.

Thank you so much for reading. I would love to hear from you if you have any comments or suggestions for new topics or how I could improve. Love you all xox

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2 thoughts on “Stomping in My Bitch Boots: A Lesson in Self-Love”

  1. looove this post!!! and loooove the bitch boots!!!!

    very empowering! I am totally with you and don’t even look at magazines anymore because I can’t stand the rediculousness.

    ps. love the note on your mirror! ❤

    1. Haha thank you sweets! I totally agree; I don’t look at those magazines either. Ok, well I do look at the covers but they are not my guidebook on how to feel good about myself haha. I love the note too! Even if I was having a crappy day it usually made me crack a little smile. 😉

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