Quick update about my New Years Goals! (Side note: I often refer to epilepsy as “my ep”, just in case you’re confused!)
Okay….so I didn’t really end up making a check list and straight forward list of the things that I wanted to do for last week, but I did end up doing quite a bit. I went for 5 walks, took my mom out for coffee, cleaned my room, did my laundry, vacuumed and saw a couple of friends. I didn’t end up doing any meditating, which is no surprise to me, because it is still a challenging goal. I am pretty pleased with those accomplishments, given the spikes in my moods and energy levels. But…if you look at this week’s goals, you’ll see that it’s still on there. So I’m not giving up on it, just because I didn’t pursue it last week. Me and meditation were just taking a little break from each other. Breaks are healthy from time to time, right?
Anyways, this week’s checklist are mostly the same as last week’s, with a few alterations. I want to go for a walk five times a week, meditate three times a week for ten minutes at a time, do some paper work (yuck), look into organizing an event, update this beautiful blog (this update doesn’t count) and continue to listen to my “pink noise” (two variations) twice a day. I do believe I have mentioned the pink noise in a previous blog post, but it was prescribed to me in my “alternative treatment”. It is supposed to calm the brainwaves that cause seizures.
I think I gave myself a pretty ambitious list of goals this week, given that I am coming out of my “seizure free period” soon. My seizures come in cycles, so I will often be “seizure free” for about 9 days, and then I will have a cluster of seizures for about 4 days. If this happens, well c’est la vie, right. It’s not like I was lazy, it just means I have to work within the scope of my capabilities during that time frame. I’m not trying to set myself up for failure by saying I want to go for 5 walks in one week, I’m just running my life based on what I want, and not what the epilepsy wants. Sure, if the seizures happens, I will make accomodations so I am not injured, and I am absolutely going to take care of my health, no questions asked. Epilepsy is all about listening to the body, and listening to the very small signals that your body is sending you. Some people with epilepsy get auras before their seizure, which is basically some sort of warning that a seizure is about to happen. It’s useful, because then it allows a person to get to a safe place before the seizure occurs. Sometimes I have an aura, but more often than not, I don’t. I will sometimes blink very rapidly, or if I’m talking I will stop talking mid sentence. Since I don’t get much of an aura before my seizure, I can and have been put in a compromising position.
I am often extra careful during my “seizure cycles” so leaving the house on my own during the seizure cycle is an absolute no-no. Even as I write this I am feeling exhausted, so I will probably have a little afternoon nap. I generally never have naps, so I must be feeling tired. Did any of that make sense? I’m just re-reading it and I’m not sure I get it. Basically I am setting out my goals of what I want to accomplish as if I am not going to have any seizures…but if I do have them, well that’s life and I’m going to take care of myself. There. That was so much easier!
Hmm…What else can I tell you? I did my nails the other day, and it made me feel quite cheerful, because I have been feeling quite bummed out all week. Maybe a future goal would be to do my friend’s nails. Spread the love! Anyways, thanks for reading. Love to you all! xox
PS : Okay I lied. This wasn’t a quick update at all. 😛