It has been eons since I have posted on here. I’ve been super busy with wedding planning, the wedding itself, and actually being married! My wife and I are elated- except I’m also feeling something else: exhausted.
Up until the end of the wedding, my epileptologist said I shouldn’t leave the house alone. As a Gregarious Introvert, I was chomping at the bit to leave the house at any opportunity I could. For anything really, coffee, a walk. You name it.
I have had some reflection time on this thought. Perhaps though, it is not the quantity of outings that we have, but the quality. I desperately wanted to go to the mall with my wife today, but I am still recovering from two weeks of seizures. Would this be a quality outing? No. I would for sure have an episode or some form of PNES. Also, my wife would be stressed and be unable to enjoy herself. Isn’t a stress free day the point of taking a self care day??
I know the people that I love to be with. If you’re reading this you are probably one of them. With more reflection, I think I should focus more time inwards and work on finding a very casual part time job at home. That would increase my level of happiness, as not having a formal job makes me feel a small lack of respect for myself. Additionally, I also perceive that others do not respect me as much. (This is my perception here not necessarily reality!) I also want to focus more time on my writing and public speaking.
Also, if I really don’t have the energy I really need to put my needs first. My seizures are finally moderately controlled but I need to monitor my energy and how I am feeling. My energy is low today and it’s hard looking at the beautiful outdoors without being able to do a power walk around the park to get more steps in. I can be a bit obsessive about steps, just saying.
What are you going to do to take care of your health? I think I might practice some yoga today and most likely have an early bedtime.
Love to you,
PS Yoga selfies are really not the greatest 😉