Category Archives: Loving Life

Sita Gaia VS. Exercise

Hey bb’s,

18268368_10154392609790776_7290771774937748565_nWoohoo it is almost summer! Finally done with the hybernating!
I have been feeling a bit down today but I had some errands around the house to do so I did them because I knew that would help. I have gone on and off being a couch potato as TV is one of the major things that calm my stress and anxiety. I remember coming home from high school in Grade 12 and Oprah was on and i felt my stress melt away as I stretched out on the couch.
In university I went to the gym 5 days a week and did Zumba on Monday nights and sometimes even Sunday mornings! I was a bit of a gym rat, and going to the gym relaxed my stress from school and relationship issues. At 21, it became difficult to go to the gym due to my uncontrolled seizures and decided that yoga would ultimately be my workout. I love yoga, but I missed that satisfaction of a sweaty workout.

Today I was looking at the photos that I put up, and one of them was of just me that my friend took in my other friend’s Jeep See above.. We were all headed to the beach and I looked so happy. “What happened to that Sita Gaia?!” I asked out loud. I quickly decided to actually use my fitness clothes that were sitting there, and I popped on my headphones and snapback. Let me tell you: running after a long time was hard and I am sure I was huffing and puffing but that’s okay! I came home and since it was SO hot out, I pointed the oscillating fan in front of me as I did more full body exercises. I feel more like myself now and my low mood has been replaced with serotonin. It’s fucking fantastic! Sure, I won’t be able to do this everyday, but this is literally a step in the right direction!!

Love,
Sita & Jojo

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My Amazing Conversation about Shame

Hey friends,

picture-of-me-1I know I put Life at Full Volume on hiatus, but that’s because when I was looking back at my most recent blog posts, it was all about Epilepsy. I didn’t see Sita Gaia there anymore. This blog is called Life at Full Volume, but seriously, it was Life on Mute. It was Life on Sad. 😦 I just have a diagnosis, and it is not WHO I am.

Truth be told, I have been drowning in Epilepsy. Between Doctor’s appointments, feeling ill, and picking up medications, I was sinking deeper and deeper.

I’m not here to tell you that I am cured, and it’s something I am working on. I do, however, want to share with you something that I love to do. I LOVE having deep, vulnerable conversations. Let me share with you something that happened recently.

I have been reading Brene Brown’s book “I Thought it Was Just Me (But it Isn’t)”. She goes in depth with her research about shame. Shame is a very heavy emotion to carry around, and everyone experiences shame in a different way. Brene Brown talks about “Speaking Shame”- the closer we are to NOT speaking shame, we have a tendency to act out or shut down. The closer we are to speaking it we express how we feel and ask for what we need.

I have a good friend who also has Epilepsy, but her epilepsy is different than mine. I always felt shame when she told me about the newest project she was working on or some new endeavour she was involved in. Prior to reading about this, I would shut down and sometimes act out. I told her in an honest conversation that I felt shame when we talked about her work, because I felt like I wasn’t measuring up. (Ridiculous, right?!) When I told her that, she explained to me that she felt shame about some things too. (WOAH, right?!) . It wasn’t a heroic act- let me tell you this. I finally had the courage to address something that I was noticing in my life.We were really able to get our hands dirty and have this open conversation about shame. In the end? I felt SO much better about our friendship and I have already noticed a shift.

I LIVE for these types of conversations. I feel like I have the strength and courage to be able to talk about things that mean something to me. Thus, I will also attract people who feel the same way. This is partly why I did my degree in Social Work- because I am not scared to wade into uncharted territories and see what will happen.

Expect LESS posts about Epilepsy in the future and more about me. It’s gonna be a good time.

Lots of love,
Sita Gaia &JoJo xox